Releasing External Validation
As the year winds down, I’m reflecting on what no longer serves me. Here’s what I released from my life in 2020:
The need for control
What is meant for me, will come for me, at exactly the perfect time. There is no need to push or be impatient. Beware of those who try to control you through false urgency, unnecessary constraints, uncomfortable pressure. Instead of reacting, practice the art of letting go and leaving.
Judgment
Your judgment of others is simply a reflection of your judgment of yourself. Those who are most judgemental are almost always the most insecure. When you notice yourself judging others, ask “What is lacking in yourself?”
Negativity, in any form
Negative thoughts, negative people, negative environments, negative media. Life is too short and too precious to allow shaming, blaming, complaining, disrespect, dishonesty, hatred, sexism, racism, or bigotry of any kind.
Fear of what other people think
Too often we allow others’ opinions of us to become greater than our own. Fear of looking stupid, weird, dumb, self-serving, crazy, inadequate, etc. in someone else’s eyes prevents us from sharing our most authentic selves. Remember, no one can dictate your self-worth if you don’t allow them. Go after your dreams unapologetically, no matter what anyone else says, thinks, or does.
... I’ll leave you with what I echo to my best girlfriends, “You do you, boo 🤍”
“When you constantly feel like you're coming from a place of being underestimated, you never feel like you belong.”
- Cat Hernandez
Everyone’s felt it. That voice in your head reminding you that you don’t belong.
That voice can be quiet at times and deafening at others, and it seems that the only way to shut it down is by gaining the validation of others.
When someone validates you, those negative thoughts are silenced, but only temporarily. The real remedy is to commit to living consciously. In other words, to actively choose how you live your life without allowing others’ opinions to dictate your priorities.
My guest today is Cat Hernandez. She is a Partner at The Venture Collective and a long time operator and investor. She believes that venture capitalists are responsible for investing in companies that are creating a positive impact and reducing inequality in society.
In this episode, we discuss:
What it means to be free and the American dream
The mental fatigue that comes with being a woman in a male-dominated industry
Overcoming Imposter syndrome and discomfort in career and life
The difference between healthy and toxic external validation
Cat’s experience growing up in Saudi Arabia, as a woman
How Cat stays motivated, focused, and self-aware
The importance of diversity in the workplace
EPISODE 35:
Releasing External Validation
WITH Cat Hernandez
Thanks for listening, I appreciate you, and am here for you.